The WiSSP Resource Library

TWINS

1.   Death of an Infant Twin, Centering Corporation

    A 4 page pamphlet describing the distinct grief of parents when one twin dies, and suggestions for working through that grief.

2.   The Death of a Twin: Miscarriage, Stillbirth, Infancy, Parents of Multiple Births Association of Canada, Inc.

    A 9 page booklet that discusses the death of a twin or twins through miscarriage, stillbirth, or in infancy. Outlines the distinctness of this special grief and suggests ways to heal. Brief mention of how to help a surviving twin.

3.   Our Newsletter, Jean Kollantai, P.O.Box 1064, Palmer, AK  99645.

    This is a newsletter by and for parents who have experienced the death of one of their twins during pregnancy, at birth, or in early infancy. This informal network of parents shares memories, helps families connect with each other, and works to develop local support activities for parents who have lost one twin. The collection of newsletters is available for lending.

4.   Having Twins by Elizabeth Noble, Houghton Mifflin, 1991.

    This is a guide to pregnancy, birth, and early childhood for parents of twins and other multiple births. Included in the book is a chapter which explores the emotional consequences of losing one or both members of a set of twins. Many of the special aspects of loss os a twin are explored including early pregnancy losses, selective reduction, stillbirth, loss of special status of being parents of twins, loss of the special twin bond for the survivor, lasting repercussions for the surviving twin and for the whole family. This chapter would best be used by families coping with twin loss as a supplement to a book dealing with perinatal loss in general. This book sometimes takes a non-traditional slant including discussions of pre-natal psychology and psychic phenomena.

5.    Embracing Laura—The Grief and Healing Following the Death of An Infant Twin, by Martha Wegner-Hay; Centering Corporation, 1998.

          This very complete little book is remarkable for the true empathy, honesty and tenderness with which it is written.  For anyone who has or will deliver multiples where one or more has died, it is to be highly recommended. The author writes of what happened after the prenatal diagnosis of twins in which one twin had a heart defect and cystic hygroma associated with Down syndrome, and the agonizing choice for selective reduction of the affected baby, whom they named Laura.  Embracing Laura is one family's story of how they learned to grieve and celebrate at the same time, following the prenatal death of their infant twin daughter and livebirth of their twin son. 

       Shared are the family's grief over having a wanted baby die, preparing for the delivery of both a liveborn and a stillborn baby, and parenting the surviving twin son David and older three year old daughter Christine. Suggestions are shared such as attending a birthing class for those who have had a previous loss, and writing a birth plan that includes specific actions for each baby.  While the author does discuss her struggle with her religious faith, the book does not have strong specific Christian overtones and would be helpful for anyone regardless of religious affiliation.  The different ways in which she and her husband grieved, what three year old Christine needed, and recognition that baby David also suffered a loss, are touched upon also.